Flick

Seems I’ve spent an inordinate amount of time watching bad movies lately.  I don’t know if it bugs you, but I have a problem with idiot characters.  Not ones that have enough back story to understand their lack of mental acuity, those can be as dumb as they like.  The ones that bug me are Joe Intelligent who has made a million RIGHT decisions and then decides it was a cat that made the noise like it was dragging heavy machinery by its tail.  (I love cats, but they don’t like tools….too noisy.)  Or the character that hears that noise in the basement while the electricity is out during a thunderstorm.  In spite of the door that locks with a deadbolt, chain lock, and keyed doorknob from outside, she decides to take her single flickering candle down to see what’s in the cellar.  LOCK THE DOOR!!!  Sit outside of it with a hatchet, meat cleaver, or shotgun.  And if anything squiggles through the pet door that isn’t Fluffy or Fritz, take action.  Just make sure that you’re making progress…if you chop off a tentacle and it grows back, the choice is RUN.  As a side note, If you keep your hatchet, meat cleavers and shot guns in your basement, I might suggest you clean out a cabinet and stash them in the kitchen.  Bad things happen in basements.  Do you want the things that go bump in the night to have your hatchet?  I didn’t think so.  My random thought of the day is that if you find yourself in a horror movie where everyone around you wants to FIND the monster or INVESTIGATE the strange basement noise or BELIEVE that a cat can make a noise like a chainsaw, may I suggest a Kevlar body suit?

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